Wednesday, October 5, 2011

THE LAST FOUR MONTHS

The last four months have caused a change in my life or should I say “a shift in my life.” The circumstances that changed my life were an eye opener not only to my present life but also to the future. How do you describe the events that cause such a shift in one’s life? A shift that is unexpected that takes you completely by surprise, an unexpected turn of events that you don’t prepare yourself to take on. It happens to others sure and you deal with it; but when it happens to you it’s an all together different feeling.

I felt angry and hurt more emotional than physical. My life on this earth could have ended in a blink of an eye for I had no idea how close I came to losing it. However, my emotional state was causing havoc.  Then something in me snapped! I was angry at the other person who caused the accident for her stupidity. I was angry at myself for not listening to my inner voice.  What do I do now? What is my life going to be like? Will I be able to be myself again? Will I be able to sit in the park or the beach, admire, and listen to God’s creations? I needed encouragement and help from others. I knew I could not deal with this alone. My inner voice was screaming for help. And help came!

Unaware of their feelings, the first to respond with a smile and a kiss was my son Angel and friend Kim (they stood by me the first critical hours.) Followed by my dear niece Silvia who shook me to realization and brought me back from the cave where I was hiding. Her words were soft but potent “you’re alive be grateful.”  Then family and friends came giving me words of encouragement.

When a person hurts deep inside from emotions and pain it is hard to bring yourself back to reality and face life again as you once knew it. It doesn’t matter how many positive books you read or how many positive affirmations you recite. If you don’t feel it, you will not come out of your cave. Feelings of fear that are so deeply rooted you have to pull and tug with all your might to get them to come out,  feelings of loneliness that seems to tear into your heart ripping it apart, and feelings of despair. But how do you begin and where do you start?

Family and friends surround yourself with those who love you. I had no idea how much I was loved!! The turning point for me was when my daughter Nidia came down from New Jersey and brought me my first grandson who was born the same week of my auto accident. The surprise visit of her and her family almost cause me to jump out of bed…Jim (my son-in-law) stretched his hand out to stop me. My eyes filled with tears as I saw Jim standing there with Julia followed by Nidia and Bradley.  Though their visit was short it inspired me to live! Watching my son with a large grin on his face and my daughters I knew I was home (metaphorically) again.  Children bring you such great joy and young ones with their innocence and full of life mentality fills your heart with love. I began to feel loved and alive. I knew then I must become strong and feel my body healing itself.

I became determined to fight this battle and not allow the physical to hinder my feelings. I will win this fight! And that I am doing! I am progressing daily and getting stronger. I feel my affirmations with love. What life has in store for me I don’t know; nor do I worry about it.  I have learned to release and let it go. I now cite my affirmations with deep feelings; the once that comes from the center of your body.  I continue to fill my mind with good inspirational literature, watch shows that make me laugh; surround myself with family and friends who inspire me. Stay in touch with my friends from across the pond and around the world through Facebook. Though some I may not have met personally, their words of encouragement and affirmations continue to inspire me.

In my reading I came across many affirmations that inspire me and I would like to share some of those now:

·         I love myself and I forgive myself

·         I deserved to be healed

·         I am worthy of being healed

·         My body knows how to heal itself

·         My healthy cells grow stronger everyday

·         I love life and Life loves me

·         All is well. Everything is working out for my highest good. Out of this situation only good will come. I am safe.*

These affirmations were extracted from Louise Hay and Cheryl Richardson’s new book You Can Create an Exceptional Life, 2011

I continue to read many books for I love reading anyway; and I share the new things learned with my family and friends. Authors that I admire and continue to inspire me are: Dr. Wayne W. Dyer, Mike Dooley, Louise Hay, John Assaraf, James Arthur Ray, and so many others that are too numerous to mention.  However, you will find many of these authors in the book from Rhonda Byrne The Secret, 2007

I have never forgotten God in this transformation and never questioned or blamed him. I know he is always there and loves me unconditionally.  And I am truly grateful to see life through different eyes those of love for all his creatures no matter how large or small. I take the time to breathe the air, listen to the songs of birds, and feel the breeze.

And the times when sadness creeps in, I quickly change my thinking! And if I even look sad, I have Silvia there to bring me back reminding me all the good things to be grateful for and we begin to recite affirmations or discuss the new book we may be reading at the time. We are not alone in this world look around and open your eyes You Are Loved!

*Note: There are many affirmations we can use; just make sure they are cited with feeling. Use the ones that will work for you. For after all we are different souls but one thing we have in common and that is LOVE!!!!! I Love You.